Over the years I’ve spoken with individuals (clients) about all different areas of their lives. Through this experience, some invaluable tips have come to light about what works to help save a marriage. Many of my clients have reported back about marriage advice, relationship help, exercises and processes that work best for them.
Here are a few of the best (and most successful) tips to add to your relationship and marriage toolbox:
1. Remember that “common sense” is not common. Everyone has their own definition of it. This is often why we don’t see eye to eye with others, including our spouses.
2. You, your partner and everyone are made up of beliefs and ideas from their upbringing and life experiences. Be Aware that they may not serve you or even be a true aspect of reality. They often are someone else’s conditioning. It’s important to be able to let them go and not always take 100% ownership of ideas and beliefs. This is why “letting go” can feel so liberating.
3. Remember the reasons you first loved the person you are with.
4. And embrace them in the change and the growth that made in their lives. People will change, and that’s not just okay. It’s part of the glory of sharing life with one person.
5. What are the strengths and qualities of your partner? Focus on those! Sometimes we lose sight of them, and this is a big mistake. Acknowledge your loved one for these qualities.
6. What do you like best about your partner? Tell and show them! This process of creatively showing your partner what you like and adore about them is often called “reigniting the spark.” And it isn’t only a sexual thing.
7. Grow personally and together – things for you and things for “you Both”.
8. Consider that some relationships are not meant to be forever. Every relationship can serve you, and it is never just the relationship. What are you learning or could be learning?
9. There are different styles of communication and learning. They are all ok, even if different from yours. Do you know communication styles (especially your partner’s) and how others see the world , or is it only through your eyes. This brings us back to common sense not being so common.
10. Cherish each other and respect your differences – how do you speak about your partner with your best friends? Remember to always look, find and focus on the positive. No one is perfect, so it’s easy to focus on the negative. Try not to go there.
11. What is fun for you both to do together? Get out and do it. Whether that’s Nature – Beach – Fitness – Walks – Sight seeing – Events – Music – Travel – Exploring – etc.
As you shift the internal (mind, subconscious, conscious) and take action, you change thedefault settings within. You will change what you will ‘naturally’ do as a reaction to what’s happening in your life. Then you start to see, feel, hear and become the “you” that truly serves you and others. Professional expertise in this makes the journey happen and gets you going!
Of course there is more depth, complexities and fine tuning that can be explored. But these tips serve as a solid foundation for getting on track and saving your marriage.
These are examples of the reasons why individuals and couples come and see me to resolve marriage concerns.
These relationship and marriage tips can help you start to resolve or at least look at marital problems or marriage issues.
If you need more focused and personal help it would be my pleasure to work with you. Call me to learn how you can get your life and marriage relationship back on track (250) 380-0702. I look forward to hearing from you.